Refresher from last posts
Depression is an evolutionary survival mechanism
There is a connection between Inflammation, Isolation and Depression. It’s a vicious cycle, once one of them occurs it fosters the appearance of other two.
Lower social rank – subordinate or submissive behavior or thoughts – leads to depression.
Social media subconsciously lowers our social rank. It’s a constant reminder that other are better than us or that we aren’t good/wealthy/beautiful/fit enough.
But social media is not the only villain that makes us depressed. We do it to ourselves…and it starts in our heads. Hereby I don’t only mean obvious things like negative self-talk, but also things that you may simply ignore and not being aware of.
Like ruminating thoughts that you don’t have enough money, need to go to work even if you don’t feel like it or you don’t have enough calories to eat this cookie because you’re on a diet.
Even if it’s a small thing like not being able to eat something you want right now, it can cause a subconscious reduction of social rank.
Not being able to do something gives the evolutionary signal to your brain that you are in the subordinate position, not the leading and dominant one, in which you can do whatever you want.
On the molecular level the brain can’t distinguish if it’s about not being able to do something because it’s dangerous – e.g. in evolutionary setting the leading ape is going to kick your ass - or if it’s just about a stupid cookie.
On the molecular level the effect is the same; release of stress hormones and inflammatory molecules, which in turn are the molecular basis of depression.
Rumination itself is supposed to cause depression.
Honestly, I see it on myself. Ruminating about problems makes me feel depressed, even if it’s not a big personal problem, but some research I work on and scientific question I try to answer. Focusing on a problem for too long and playing it over and over in my heard lowers my mood, which eventually can down spiral and cause a real depressed state.
What do I do in such case?
I force myself to break the cycle.
I force myself to stop overthinking things, particularly when these are things I can’t change.
I force myself to reword the things I am not allowed to do by telling myself why I do them and what benefit I get.
e.g. “I choose not to have this cookie, because this helps me to reach my goal faster, look better and be healthier.” This helps me seeing things in a more positive light.
Speaking of positivity. Happiness research supports this approach. In order to flourish, meaning feeling good and not just not being depressed, you should have 3 times more positive experiences than negative in your everyday life – for great content on positive psychology and fitness follow my friend and former colleague Thomas Campidell.
Positive experiences and thoughts not only make our lives happier and more enjoyable, but also help recovery from health incidents, increase immune function, lower the stress hormone cortisol and inflammatory response to stress. As you know by now, cortisol and inflammatory molecules are linked to depression.
To go even further there is a link between positive experiences and longevity.
Positive experience isn’t reduced to only physical things or interactions with others, it starts in our heads and how we see things.
What you have to do:
Recognize thoughts that lower your social rank
These can be thoughts, such as
I am not allowed to do this or that…or…
I don’t have enough XYZ…or…
Why do I need to do this? I don’t want to!
Once you spotted them, think why you’re doing what you’re doing. What is deeper meaning or reason behind it? If you look at the big picture, does it bring your forward?
e.g. I don’t want to work, but I want to have money to live a good life. Think about good life you’re creating.
e.g. I don’t want to diet now, but I really want to have these badass sixpack. Visualize the badass body you’re building.
e.g. I don’t have enough money now, but I can work harder to get into a higher position. Take it as motivation to progress and make your life better.
Recognize rumination
Rumination means overthinking and obsessing over things that may happen. Often the things we overthink don’t even depend on us and we can’t do anything about them.
e.g. What if my plane will be late? What if I won’t arrive in time?
e.g. What if he doesn’t call me back?
If the things you ruminate don’t depend on you, stop your thoughts immediately. Every time this thought comes into your mind send it way, forbid yourself to engage into this anxiety fostering discussion in your head. You are in control of your thoughts. Just do it.
If you can do / change something about things you ruminate on, let it out of your head. Write a plan of action with backup options.
If this happens, I do this (Plan A).
If plan A doesn’t work, I will do this (Plan B).
If plan B doesn’t work, I will do the following (Plan C), etc.
The important thing is to write it down clearly and then every time the thoughts come into your mind refer to the list and not to continue thinking the same thoughts and ruminating on them.
You have the control over your thoughts. You determine what is in your head. Your head is your castle.